Are you bored yet?

Well don't worry. Because I've solved boredom. I have the answer.

It's sadism.

Yep. Sadism is the answer.

Next time you’re bored, you know, waiting for more than 2 seconds in a queue, before you reach for your phone, find someone to be mean to:

Kick a dog.
Write something horrible on Twitter.
Leave a friend on ‘read’.

You’ll feel so much better. And your boredom will have vanished.

OK. So it’s not the perfect solution. And maybe some of you have already tried this?

But it does work. It does actually relieve boredom. (There are studies on this involving worms and coffee grinders - don't ask).

But surely there are better solutions?

Why You're More Bored Than Ever

Why is it that you're so bored these days? You have all the music ever to listen to. Forty five billion podcasts (more or less), endless Netflix biopics, any book you've ever wanted. These are all just a click away. So why are you so bored?

I tend to think about two types of boredom. The first one is the teenage kind. You know, stuck in traffic. In a queue. It's not much fun but it's not really boredom. And it's over pretty soon.

The second is the adult kind. The deep, existential hole. The kind that creeps up on you on a quiet Saturday afternoon and makes you question every life decision you’ve ever made.

Sound familiar?

If so, you’re not alone and no, it’s not just a “you” problem. It’s all of us.

Despite living in the golden age of entertainment, we’re all getting more bored. Not less.

Why is that?

We tend to treat boredom like it’s trivial. An inconvenience. Something to scroll away.

But boredom is actually a deeply uncomfortable emotional state and it’s telling you something important.

Scientists define boredom as a withdrawal of meaning.

That empty, restless feeling you get? It’s not laziness. It’s your brain telling you that your need for purpose is going unmet.

It’s a warning light on your dashboard, blinking: “Refuel required.”

Which brings me to a very handy analogy…

Life is a Road Trip

Picture your life like driving a car at night. You need two things to get you where you're going:

Headlights – That’s your attention.
Petrol tank – That’s your sense of purpose.

When both are working, you’re cruising.

You’re paying attention to people and things that matter, and those activities fill your tank. Dinner with friends, a walk outside, a song that hits just right (probably one of Kompa55's latest bangers).

Those moments refill your purpose meter.

But when your fuel runs low or your attention wanders off? The road ahead goes dark.

You’re drifting. That’s boredom.

The Three Ways You Respond to Boredom

When you hit that bored-out-of-your-mind moment, you’ve got three basic options:

1. Get Sadistic

This is more common than you think. When we feel meaningless and powerless, we sometimes lash out (not because we’re evil) but because even negative meaning is still meaning. Studies show people will literally electrocute themselves rather than sit quietly in a room with their thoughts. Yikes.

2. Zone Out

You pull out your phone. You scroll. You consume.

Nothing wrong with that. We all do it. This is the world we live in today. But if it becomes your only response to boredom, that's not good. It short circuits the feedback loop that boredom is supposed to trigger: reflection, reassessment, and reorientation toward something meaningful.

The science shows that it’s a vicious cycle.

The more you use your phone to escape boredom, the more bored you become. Your digital fix is actually sucking meaning from your petrol tank.

So you break down sooner, and more often.

3. Do the Hard Thing

This is the one we don’t want to do: sit with our boredom. Feel it. Let our minds wander.

But this is also where the magic happens.

When you stay with your boredom - really stay - your brain kicks into its “default mode.”

That’s where you do big picture thinking, future planning, creative problem solving.

It’s where meaning lives.

That heavy Saturday afternoon feeling? That’s your brain offering you the rare chance to actually reflect, recalibrate, and (if you’re lucky) create.

Boredom isn’t a Bug, it’s a Feature.

It wasn’t always like this.

Hundreds of years ago, meaning was baked into daily life. Religion, ritual, community, survival. They gave people a story. Boredom was mostly the domain of monks and aristocrats. Everyone else was just trying to stay alive.

Today, boredom has been democratised.

And that freedom is both a gift and a challenge. We no longer have meaning baked into the daily grind, we have to create it. And that’s harder than it sounds.

But it also means we get to choose. We can curate meaning. We can build it intentionally, piece by piece, by paying attention to things that move us.

Boredom as a Portal

Think of boredom not as a problem, but as a doorway. A space between what is, and what could be.

And when you step through it, instead of running from it, there’s real potential on the other side.

For creativity. For connection. For direction.

So next time you find yourself stuck in the metaphorical car at 3pm on a Saturday, consider doing the hard thing.

Don’t scroll. Don’t rage. Just don’t.

Sit there. Be present. Pay attention.

So...What Can You Actually Do?

If boredom is a signal, not a problem, how do we respond constructively? Here’s what I’m trying lately (and what the science backs up):

1. Notice It

Instead of rushing to kill the feeling, try just noticing it. That’s it. Recognise the sensation without judgment. This small act of awareness interrupts the cycle and gives you a moment to choose your next move.

2. Accept It

Yes, it’s uncomfortable. No, you’re not broken. Boredom is your body’s cue that something’s off and like any good signal, it becomes useful when you listen to it instead of smothering it.

3. Connect with Others

Relationships are one of the most reliable sources of meaning. You don’t need to pour your soul out over coffee (though you can). Even showing up to a concert, a book club, or a local event can help refuel your tank. You could even join others and listen to a new radio station...

4. Get Curious

Find something to nerd out about. Music, trains, birds, ancient cities, Minecraft - whatever. Curiosity is like a compass that points toward meaning.

5. Create

You don’t have to write a novel. Cook something. Paint something. Doodle. The act of creating, no matter how small, lights up the parts of your brain that remind you you’re alive and capable of shaping your world.

6. Go Outside

Nature hits reset. There’s something about trees, water, and sky that quietly recalibrates our nervous systems. Walking also helps spark the kind of free flowing thoughts that boredom naturally invites.

I’m still figuring this out too. But I’m finding that boredom isn’t something to get rid of, it’s something to notice. And something to work with.

And when I do, I usually come out the other side a little more grounded, a little more clear, and sometimes, not always, a little more inspired.

Until next time,

Jon "Doomscroller" Kaye

Finding meaning

P.S.

If this newsletter has bored you to death, then, I'm sorry about that. Click here to relieve that boredom (NOT a virus download link. NOT spam. Not me trying to trick you into signing up for something.)